Day 341 In the Pursuit of Love (What Would You Do?)

QUOTE: “If you were hosting a party or head of meeting and you had a person who needed fragrance-free and a person who showed up wearing fragrance — one person HAS to go — which one is it going to be? And why? What would you say to the person leaving?”
I HAVE SUFFERED FROM MCS IN ONE FORM OR ANOTHER FOR SOOOOOOOOO LONG I CAN’T REMEMBER NOT HAVING MCS—- BUT IN ALL THE YEARS— IT IS ALWAYS ME WITH MCS — WHO LEAVES— WHEN SOMEONE HAS TO WEAR SCENTED PRODUCTS– & EVERY SINGLE TIME– I THINK I CAN ALLOW ANYONE INTO OUR MCS SAFE HOME— I FIND IT NEVER WORKS–NEVER— I AM SICK– SICK–SICK–SICK– & NO SAFE PLACE ON EARTH TO GO TO REBUILD MY HEALTH—- SO IF I WANT AN MCS SAFE HOME– I CAN NO LONGER ALLOW ANYONE IN MY SAFE HOME— JUST THAT PLAIN & SIMPLE– & AS FAR AS GOING ANY PLACE & REALLY BEING SAFE– I HAVE NOT BEEN ABLE TO — SO I ONLY TRY TO LEAVE MY MCS SAFE HOME WHEN MY IMMUNE SYSTEM IS AT IT’S BEST & JUST KNOW I AM GOING TO ENCOUNTER TOXIC CHEMICALS— AS EVERYONE NO MATTER HOW CAREFUL– USUALLY HAVE TOXIC CHEMICALS ON THEM— I ALSO FIND IT TO BE A REAL INVASION OF OUR PRIVACY TO LET PEOPLE INTO OUR MCS SAFE HOME– WHO NO MATTER HOW HARD YOU EXPLAIN–IN LOVE– OR JUST PLAIN FACTS— SOME PEOPLE DON’T REALLY CARE!!!!!!!!!!!!! I AM OLD– I EXPLAIN– ABOUT MCS– IF THEY DON’T CARE– I JUST DON’T MAKE THE EFFORT ANYMORE– TO KNOW I WILL DESTROY MY HEALTH–IF I TRY TO BE A PART OF A SOCIAL EVENT THAT PEOPLE WILL HAVE ON TOXIC CHEMICALS— WHEN I WAS YOUNGER I DID– NOW I DON’T– IT TAKES ME LONGER TO HEAL– & I HAVE MORE HEALTH PROBLEMS TO GO ALONG WITH THE MCS– SO IF I WANT TO BE WELL– I REALLY AVOID MOST ALL SOCIAL EVENTS OR MEETINGS– ETC- ETC!!!! FOR YEARS & YEARS & YEARS I HAD FAMILY MEMBERS WHO WENT OUT OF THEIR WAY TO HURT ME & MAKE ME ILL– YA KNOW I DON’T NEED THEM IN MY LIFE!!! LIFE IS GOOD WITHOUT THEM!!! NOW FOR YOUNG PEOPLE LIKE BIRTHDAY PARTIES– & EVENTS– IT IS A WHOLE NOTHER WORLD– THEY WANT TO BE A PART OF LIFE OUTSIDE THEIR MCS SAFE HOMES– THAT IS HARDER—- AT MY AGE– I HAVE LEARNED TO ENJOY THINGS THAT DON’T MAKE ME ILL!!!!!! AND AVOID PEOPLE WHO I NOW KNOW WILL MAKE ME ILL!!!! AS I TELL GARY– I ENJOY OUR OWN COMPANY!!!! BUT — I AM THE ONE WHO ALWAYS LEAVES– I DON’T WANT TO CAUSE PROBLEMS– I DON’T WANT AN ENCOUNTER OVER MY ILLNESS— I HAVE BEEN HURT TO THE BONE SO MANY TIMES– I AVOID NOW!!! AND MORE & MORE & MORE I AVOID– ANY EVENT OR OUTING– OR MEETING– OR WHAT EVER AS SOMEONE WILL & DOES HAVE ON TOXIC CHEMICALS!!!! THE OLDER I GET– THE LESS I NEED OF GOING OUT OF MY MCS SAFE HOME– I HAVE NOT FOUND A WAY TO BE AROUND OTHERS OUT OF MY MCS SAFE HOME & BE SAFE!!! I WISH I KNEW THE ANSWER FOR OTHER PEOPLE WHO ARE ENCOUNTERING THE PROBLEMS– THAT I NOW JUST PLAIN AVOID!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Life in the City with a Future

I used to not want to talk about my MCS — no surprise that when I first spoke out some people wore more fragrances, some people specifically targeted me… I figured the more I spoke of MCS — the more I was going to attract those attacks. It took me a really long time to live the difference between being kind/diplomatic/assertive (place of Love) instead of as a push over/victim/antagonistic (place of fear). Okay I’m still working on it.

I have found there is a vast difference between stating the facts about MCS (or any other issue) and standing up for my rights rather than being antagonistic or submissive.

Real change only happens when we leave the guilt and judgment out of it. 

Guilt can bring about faster results sometimes but it doesn’t last because it also carries with it resentment so the change will eventually fail.

In dealing with an issue that involves ignorance or…

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About sondasmcschatter

I was encouraged to start a blog as I suffer from MCS /multi chemical sensitivities & other health problems & I have helped several hundred others who suffer from MCS set up "Safe Homes" & given them encouragement & HOPE & share information & lots of laughs along the way also. When you choose to use fragrances, chemicals, or pesticides, You are not simply making a choice for yourself, You are making a choice for everyone around you!!!! What makes me an expert on MCS-- not a darn thing-- BUT have lived with it for years-& years- & have learned lots the HARD WAY-- by experience!! And want to give others help & HOPE & encouragement -- as I know there are not many who understand what it is to live with this illness- & ALL THAT GOES WITH IT!!! Internet has been my way of communication with many who we are confined to their "safe homes" all over the USA & other countries!! I have communicated with many HUNDRED by e-mail-- phone & letters & internet forums-- I hope this blog will help in a better way to share laughter-- hope & information!!! As for many are not any longer able to even leave their homes-- & communication is sooo important & sharing & encouragement & GIVING HOPE!!!
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